Last night I saw an announcement on our Signal Cartel Discord: one Jec Charante, famous Vulfpeck person and friend of SC, was going to be leading a training session this morning.
Sounds like fun, I said to myself. If I wake up in time, I'll go fly with them. And so I did.
Unfortunately, I'm incredibly bad at EVE. So this is how it went.
Had plenty of time to get set up for fleet, but spent it doing other things. When I went to jump clone to Zoohen to fleet up, I found that my Linux box needed to be carefully taken down and rebooted. So…yeah.
By the time I actually get to Zoohen, I'm already five minutes late. Ugh. I contact Jec, who gives me a fleet invite. "Do you have a Vexor Navy Issue?" "Why yes, yes I do."
Fleet comms is Teamspeak, which I'd forgotten about. So I fire up my Teamspeak, which turns out to be literally two plus years old and will no longer work. It actually tries to connect to Sev3rance from back when I was in Blue Tridents, which corp hasn't been active since sometime in 2015. So now I'm looking at minimum of 15 minutes to get a new version of Teamspeak installed and get connected. Everyone leaves without me at my encouragement, but I am contracted bookmarks for the the fleet destinations.
By the time I've sorted Teamspeak, the fleet is headed for their second wormhole, so I join them. I jump on through, and we warp into the first combat anomaly. I go to enter the rep chain for our spider tank — and realize I've brought a VNI without any reppers. It is some old SC Sleeper Eradication Division fit and not a Vulfpeck fit at all. How nice. I manage to warp out before the Sleepers lock me, anyhow. I head back to Zoohen to pick up some reppers — and realize that I forgot to bookmark the wormhole exit. What am I, first week in game? I sit there a while, being too embarrassed to even ask for a warp to exit, but when I finally do I am reminded that the bookmarks I was contracted earlier already have it.
I fly back to Zoohen with my tail between my legs and look around aimlessly for some armor reppers. When I don't find any, I just give up. Jec could contract me a loaner VNI as originally offered, but she's busy actually running her training fleet, with three pilots cheerfully learning the way of Sleeper destruction. So I call it and tell them to have fun without me.
I continue to listen on comms as I do other work. The other pilots take turns FC-ing. Eventually the fleet gets jumped by Wingspan, and Jec's ship doesn't make it. Everybody else heads back.
Things I knew but didn't do anyway:
Be on time for fleet. Ahead of time, by at least 15 minutes.
Make sure your tech is set up the day before. If it isn't, don't go.
Check your fit carefully. It matters.
Bookmark wormhole entrances and exits yourself.
Fly regularly. If you haven't been flying for several weeks, you probably aren't ready to fly with others.
Play some easier game. EVE is hard.
This is how I literally failed a training fleet.